Do you have problems at home because your children do not want to share? Do you feel that you have become more of a referee than a father? Here are some parenting ideas and tools to help end the chaos and yelling in your home. Parenting tools will help you teach your children the importance of sharing and how to share in a way that feels fair to all children involved.
First of all, children under the age of two should not be expected to share. At this age, they are not developmentally ready to share. Ideally, with children under the age of two, you would have several toys that are the same. If you don’t have two of the same toy so the children can have one, then you may distract one of the children who is in a confrontation over a toy. Children this age are easy to get sidetracked and distracted by another activity. This is fine at this young age. The child will have time in the future when he is ready to learn to share.
If you have children over the age of two, this is a good age to start teaching them about sharing and the importance of sharing. One method of doing this is to use a timer like
Time timer. Let them know the amount of time they will each have and they can set the timer for them to take turns. No more putting mom in the middle of things. This parenting tool can help you put the responsibility of sharing in her hands. Remind them that if they can’t get this to work on the timer, the toy will be taken from them and no one will use it. This will give them incentives to practice taking turns and sharing.
Another way to encourage your children to share is by using the Responsibility Chart. This chart uses positive reinforcement to get the behaviors you want from your children. Pick the sharing magnet to focus on for the first week. This may be one of the goals for the week or it may be the only goal depending on the age of your child. After showing your child the chart, explain that each week there are responsibilities she has. If you complete those tasks and responsibilities, you will get your reward. Find out what each child’s personal coin is and use it as a reward. Kids currency is anything your child values. Some examples are: extra TV time, a special one-on-one outing with your parents, family movie night, allowance, etc. The idea may be different for each child depending on what they really value.
Sharing is a behavior learned by children. It is our job as parents to teach them the importance and value of sharing with friends and siblings. By implementing the Responsibility Chart in your home, you can teach your children to share and also achieve many more goals that you have for your children. These sharing tips will help you teach your child the valuable life lesson of sharing.
The tools mentioned in this article can be found at www.ModernMommiesToolbox.com
By Anna Bignon Early Childhood Educator
